Not Not Risotto (Is in fact Risotto!)

First, go get yourself some Arborio or Perborato Rice. I've got one rice bowl's worth here. This makes about 4 tiny portions, 3 decent portions, 2 healthy portions, or 1 giant portion with which you find out is probably more than you want to eat but you'll eat it anyways because you spent all that effort to make it so you eat it anyways and quickly because cold risotto ain't no good. Oh yeah, rinse your rice!
















Make some soffritto with olive oil, some super small chopped onions, celery, and carrots. I used shallots because I could buy just a small piece for 16 cents and not worry about an onion not getting used and going bad in my fridge. And not to mention, getting all oniony!
















So when the onions/shallots become golden brown, toss in the rice. Careful not to let it burn. You don't want a burnt taste hiding in there. If you want to add peas or mushrooms, you should add then in at this time. I added both.
















Little by little, add your broth. Make sure you have plenty! You don't want to run out, scramble, and have to make some impromptu vegetable broth. Anyways, so while you add the broth in little by little...
















Stir in one direction. It doesn't totally make sense but Deda says so so don't ask questions!
















It takes about 20 minutes for the rice to cook. Keep at it with the adding of broth, the rice soaking it up, the stirring, the adding until the rice is done. The highlighted rice is not done. You can see because the middle is still opaque. Or you can just eat a grain when no one is looking. If someone sees you eating it before it's done, you'll turn into a pillar of salt.
















Speaking of salt, you should taste it to check if it needs any salt. So I guess taste it either way. Pillar of Salt of not. Add some white wine, a dab of butter, and if you've got it, saffron for Milanese style. The wine should be room temp. Just like how cold Risotto is bad, putting icy cold wine in just isn't the best thing for it.
















Serve immediately because of course, cold Risotto is not to be had. Optional: serve with some Parmiggiano cheese. Eat. Don't let anyone see you.