Friday, December 16, 2005

Night of Insanity

Night. of Insanity. The night actually started off quite well. Secret Level was hosting a holiday party and a fellow I met at the last IDGA meeting was nice enough to invite me. I got there, had some snacks (no real dinner) and red wined my way through the night. There was a dance floor I got to burn some rug on, a game room where a girl kicked my butt in DOA:Ultimate once again proving there are female gamers. I ran into a poker room where I silently scoffed at their 10 and 20 cent blinds but it was the local natives who got the last laugh as I got a bad beat with 4 players going all in. Pizza's found their way to the suite later in the evening. Everythings going swell!

Things are winding down... Hey, let's go head over to 1984 at the Cat Club! That's great! Jimmy! is over there. He's like a mini-celebrity there. So we head over. I check with the driver. He's ok to drive. Great! Directions? Set. Turn Left? Woah! Crazy driver! Is this how you change lanes? Road Closed! Where are you going? Protruding manhole in dirt road! Dirt road is San Francisco? Something isn't right! Why aren't you stopping driver? Concrete medium barriers! Why do I keep alternating between exclamations and questions? Ditch! Stuck? Stuck! Stuck in a ditch on a dirt road running under some bridge construction. Well gee. This is swell. I can only guess that he thought "road closed" meant "no, no, we just don't want you to mess up our dirt, the other side of the road is in fact open. not really" So there's a total of four of us. We get out and try pushing quite a few times but the ditch is pretty deep, the car is only FWD, and the ditch is also filled with water so each time we try the gas, is there EVER a holy fountain of mud. By the end of the night there was mud to go around. After several more tries of this, using planks of wood found in the construction area wedged under the tires and such, I just flat out give up. I go off towards the main road with one of the passengers and just chill out and talk things out. What a ridiculous situation we're in. Who gets stuck in a ditch in a CITY??? Really, just how many such ditches even exist within any American metropolitan areas? This was right downtown. I guess any construction zone in any metropolitan area is bound to have a ditch somewhere so - well so much for my rant. I guess a triple-A tow truck is headed our way. We head towards the other end of the road to wait for the truck. Still chatting it out. I check my clock. I'm gonna take the bus home. I'll wait this out as much as I can. I don't want to ditch on my hosts. Penguins! I mean, Tow truck! So as I walk back towards the car I see the tow truck drive down and turn around. The tow part aligning to face the car- now he's driving towards me? Um... huh? Apparently they got the car out? How? Well, I thank the tow dude for coming out. I guess he's getting paid anyways. He doesn't seem annoyed one bit. As I get closer to the car I see mob of homeless people surround the car. One of them is holding a spoiler in his hands (wtf?). I get over there and my passenger companion wielding a heavy piece of re-bar (wft?). The driver hands me the keys and tells me "nate, get the car turned around, ok?" Um... sure. I don't know wtf is going on and it'll take too long to explain. I've been waiting like an hour to get out of here. Car's turned around, homeless people apparently helped him get the car out. Mobbing for money. Especially the ones who didn't help. Both the warm side and black eye of the homeless community are represented. There were those who came out generously offering aid to fellow humans in need because they understand as is their situation. Then there were the ones who will take advantage of every situation - out of want and not always out of need. That's painting too black and white of an image of it. Just a quick impression. In 5 full years in San Francisco, I come to try to spot out the genuine and thankful homeless versus the bitter and spiteful scammers and money hustlers. Hey!

1984! It's 2am. We have 1 more hour of partying to go! One more hour to salvage the evening. I've got the keys, I'm driving. I'm driving fine but I am a little freaked out. It's not the 6 glasses of wine I had tonight. That hour of sitting around really sobered me up. It's the fact the car is covered in mud. I can't see out the back window. The mirrors are covered in mud. Driving in the city is all about mirrors! 1984! I find parking right in front of the club! I rule! How did you get out of your crate? Our surly driver still worked up about the night get's into an arguement with the doorman at the cat club. nope! not getting in now! I did want to go see my friend Jimmy! but I can't ditch the hosts (the driver maybe) so we sadly sit outside. I watch the driver rant about the doorman. Passenger buys me a bacon dog. Taxi. Bus. Home. Insanity. No?

So I'm not too mad at the driver. I'm mad I got put in a car with a drunk driver. I'm mad the evening ended so badly but I won't stay mad. I can't. But do that again, I bust... um something bad. yes. on your knee. groin.

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